1 Year For Us, 50 Years for Singapore

Yesterday was the one-year anniversary of our arrival in Singapore. We landed just after midnight on 8/11/14, stayed at the hotel next to the airport, and took possession of our condo mid-morning. We had rental furniture and only what we were able to transport in our suitcases until our air shipment and container arrived. We were jet-lagged, we didn’t know much about anything, and we didn’t have any friends. The start of school was looming, and figuring that whole situation out was pretty intimidating. Brad started his new role at work the day after we arrived, which meant the kids and I were left to fend for ourselves, getting organized and dealing with issues such as what we were going to eat, given our lack of kitchen supplies, and how to get around, given our lack of a car. It was weeks before I had a cell phone or a local credit card. We had several issues with our air conditioning that left us frustrated and really sweaty in this tropical environment. We were facing what seemed at the time to be an interminable stretch of separation from our family and friends at home. Intense doesn’t begin to describe our initial weeks in Singapore.

A year later, we are fresh off our long-anticipated trip home for the summer. Brad had been home 3 times throughout the year, but for the kids and me, it was our first time back post-move. Kylie, Jenna, Logan, and I were home for 5.5 weeks, and Brad was able to join us for the first 3. We crammed in visits with as many people as possible, arranging some ahead of time and making others impromptu, between exciting things like doctor and dentist appointments. Brad worked the first 2 weeks of the trip, as we shuffled between our parents’ homes, a hotel near Brad’s office, and nights with friends. Our third week was spent on our annual Wisconsin vacation with my family, which felt delightfully normal. Brad left on 7/13 to return to SG. The kids and I spent another week with Brad’s family and then a week and a half with mine. We got reacquainted with my 2 toddler nephews; they quickly got used to having their 3 big cousins around, and watching them play together was wonderful. We visited our old neighborhood, saw our house, and even met the new owners (who happened to come outside while we were chatting with neighbors). Driving the kids around Libertyville in our rental car was really exciting for me; we enjoyed the few days we had there to see friends and do some of our usual things, like a trip to the pool. We ate our fill of the American foods we’d been craving, visiting many of our favorite restaurants while catching up with different people. We thoroughly celebrated Independence Day, making it to 2 different firework displays. Ky and Jen even got their traditional red-white-and-blue manicures, since apparently, Mom was not allowed to take this year off from nail-painting duties, despite the fact that the morning of July 4th was spent packing up to move to yet another location. It was almost surreal; while we were home, it was hard to believe that nearly a year in Singapore had happened, and now that we’ve returned, it’s hard to believe that we were actually home for over a month.

I had always maintained that I would not be making the trip to or from Asia alone with the kids. However, as Brad’s work commitments for the summer shifted several times just before we booked our flights, it became clear that if I wanted to maximize our time in the U.S., the kids and I would have to come back to SG on our own. Approximately 9,400 miles and a full day of travel later, I’m proud to say that we did it. Despite spending the bulk of their summer fighting with each other over just about everything (because when you don’t have a house and are constantly on the move, it’s all up for grabs; throw a little jet lag into that lack of a routine, and watch out), the kids rose to the occasion and acquitted themselves quite nicely. We checked 3 bags and carried on 3 duffels, 2 backpacks, and my purse; no luggage was left behind, and everybody carried at least 1 item. One notable event from the trip back was that after countless in-flight trips to the bathroom with Jenna, who has always been too nervous to go into the lavatory on her own, my girl finally decided that going by herself was no big deal… on her very last potty break of the journey. I’ll take it, though; I’m hoping this paves the way for all future flights! My buddy Logan did not sleep at all on the 15-hour flight from Chicago to Hong Kong. At one point, after the first meal had concluded, I got everybody all set to sleep and settled in for a nap myself; I woke up several hours later to find both girls sound asleep, but Logan sitting up next to me, chatting with a flight attendant. She told me that she’d walked past us several times and noticed that Lo was just staring at me while I slept, so she decided to help him find something to watch, which is what they were up to when I opened my eyes. (Logan subsequently fell asleep as soon as we boarded the plane for our 2nd flight, and he slept the whole way from HK to SG.) There was another mom of 3 sitting near us on both of our flights (causing the flight attendants to ask if we were all together), and once back in Singapore, she and her kids ended up having to split into 2 taxis to get all of their bags home (meaning that she put her oldest daughter, who looked to be about Ky’s age, in charge of the 2nd taxi); luckily, we fit everything into a single cab for the ride home from the airport at 1 a.m. (Did I just call Singapore home? Yes, I guess I did. I need to continue to go with the U.S. being “home-home” and SG being “home,” I suppose; returning did, in fact, feel like coming home, with Brad and all our belongings, in our familiar condo, here waiting for us.)

Ky in Hong Kong

Jen in Hong Kong

Lo in Hong Kong

Since the start, I’ve considered living in our condo to be an experience akin to going to college as a family. Expats’ stays in Singapore tend to be temporary, and nobody has any family here. We all need friends. Last year was so much like being a freshman in college, meeting our neighbors in the “dorm,” and quickly becoming friends. After bonding during the school year and leaving for the summer, it was exciting to get back here and see everyone. For us, it definitely had the feel of returning for sophomore year- knowing what to expect, feeling comfortable, and having friends to come back to. It’s so much easier now than it was a year ago!

It’s also very different to know that after all this effort, we’re now in the final countdown of our Asian adventure. We will not be in SG a year from now; our return to normal life will be here before we know it. As such, we’re feeling the pressure to make the most of our second and final year away. We’re making more travel plans, and we’re also continuing to explore all that Singapore has to offer.

This weekend was a big one for Singapore, as Sunday marked its 50th birthday. They call it National Day, and because it was the big 5-0, they even made it a 4-day weekend. We wanted to take part in some way, but we weren’t really looking to go to the parade (as we’d attended something called the Chingay Parade back in February, and we figured it’d be pretty similar), and we didn’t feel the need to go see the fireworks, since we’d just done that twice in the U.S. (a good call, since we watched both the parade and the fireworks on TV, and the fireworks were impressive but very, very short- certainly not worth the effort of fighting the crowds). So, we settled on going down to Marina Bay to watch the Republic of Singapore Air Force (RSAF) Black Nights. They put on a 25-minute aerial display beginning at noon each of 3 days, 8/7-8/9. We tried to go watch them on Friday, but that didn’t go so well. When we got on the train by our condo, it was sunny; when we exited the train down near Marina Bay, it had started to drizzle. One would think that after living here for a year, we would have come prepared with umbrellas, but it had already been a rainy week, and we foolishly felt secure about the sunny weather that day. We found a spot to sit near the Merlion (famous symbol of Singapore; check out the pic below), across from the iconic Marina Bay Sands (a resort- hotel, casino, restaurants, shopping, etc.). In the absence of any specific directions about where the best viewing would be, we, and the thousands of people around us, mistakenly assumed that this would be a fine spot from which to watch the planes. The drizzle became a heavier rain as we waited for the show to begin, if it was even going to begin, given the increasingly poor weather conditions. Finally, just after noon, we spotted the planes in the distance, but they were flying low, on the far side of the Marina Bay Sands. We quickly came to understand that our location was wrong, visibility was poor anyway, and the rain wasn’t stopping. So, the crowd began to disperse, and we headed home, soggy and not sure that we were going to try this again. We skipped the opportunity to go back on Saturday, as it had rained all morning, and we didn’t quite trust that the weather would cooperate this time. After talking to friends who did go on Saturday and enjoyed it, we tried again on Sunday. It ended up being fantastic. The train was free on National Day, which was a nice perk. We stationed ourselves on the other side of the MBS this time, and we managed to stay pretty close to the train station’s entrance, so we could get back on the train quickly, once the show was over. Promptly at noon, 6 fighter jets headed our way, and a very impressive display of aerial maneuvers ensued. Jen hadn’t been too thrilled about standing out in the hot sun, waiting for the planes, but once they appeared, she was as enthralled as the rest of us. At one point, one of the jets roared by so low over our heads that we could feel the vibration in our chests; a number of babies right around us immediately burst into tears, but for those of us who understood what was going on, it was pretty spectacular. Pictures don’t do it justice, but I’ve included a few. This was by far the best event we’ve attended in Singapore.

Our first attempt at watching the planes, down by the Merlion; that’s Marina Bay Sands behind the Merlion

Better prepared on Sunday, and just like true Singaporeans, using our umbrellas as shade

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Jets heading our way as Logan watches

Pretty awesome (and so close!)

 

 

 

 

 

 

Can you guess what they’re drawing in the sky?

Making progress

 

 

 

 

 

 

Almost done

2 hearts! (I didn’t quite get the bottom of the big one; it all happened so fast.)

 

 

 

 

 

 

Our holiday weekend is over, and yesterday was the first day of school for the kids (thus, my ability to sit down and write this blog post). We went to orientation last week, and it was so nice to know where to go and what to do. Everyone came home happy after school yesterday afternoon, so the year seems to be off to a good start. The adventure continues!

Sick in Singapore

In an effort to be sure that we experience all that Singapore has to offer, we recently decided to get an inside look at the Singaporean healthcare system by trying out a nearby hospital. Eleven-year-old Kylie was discharged last week after a two-day stay to treat pneumonia; while certainly not something to be taken lightly, she was feeling so much better by the time she was admitted that she and I had a pretty pleasant stay and actually kind of enjoyed ourselves during what felt a bit like a mother-daughter retreat. She is doing just fine; hence, my light-hearted tone and tongue-in-cheek opening line.

I had taken Ky to a walk-in clinic at the hospital last week because she had a fever that just wouldn’t quit and a cough that wasn’t going away. After a quick exam at the clinic, the doctor prescribed antibiotics and told us to come back 2 days later, just to be sure the meds were working. An interesting difference in the system here versus in the U.S. is that when a patient needs medicine here, there’s no need to stop at the pharmacy on the way home, which I always find to be a particularly unpleasant form of torture when I have a sick child in tow. Instead, the doctor’s office dispenses the medicine. In our case, it was a whole lot of medicine- 2 types for fever, 2 for cough, cough drops, and the antibiotics; this seemed a bit excessive, but I felt like I had to just go along with it. Brad couldn’t believe it when we brought the bursting bag of goodies home. One part I didn’t like as much was that they don’t reconstitute the medicine for you, so I’ve been playing pharmacist at home- kind of a pain. On the plus side, prices here seem to be more reasonable- they don’t play the same ridiculous insurance game that we experience in the U.S. (Interestingly, Bloomberg ranked Singapore’s healthcare system as the most efficient in the world in 2014; the U.S. was #44. The article can be found here: http://www.bloomberg.com/news/articles/2014-09-18/singapore-beats-hong-kong-in-health-efficiency-southeast-asia.)

By the time I brought Kylie back for her follow-up appointment 2 days later, her fever was finally gone, and only the nagging cough remained. Imagine our surprise, then, when the X-ray the doctor ordered “just to be sure” showed a patch on her right lung that indicated pneumonia and resulted in the doctor recommending admitting her to administer IV antibiotics. This seemed like a terrible idea to poor Ky while we were down in the clinic, but once we were shown to her room and had settled in, she ended up being okay with the situation. The private hospital we were in was beautiful. Ky’s room looked more like a hotel room that just happened to have a hospital bed in it. We had a great view out the window and were even able to see the Singapore Flyer, as pictured in the first photo. The bathroom was all marble (which seems to be the material of choice here in Singapore but was still somewhat unexpected in such quantity in a hospital bathroom), and the toilet was a Toto “Washlet”- it had almost as many options as an automatic car wash, though the only unusual feature we took advantage of was the heated seat, which was a nice way to combat the chill of the A/C.

Lots of marble and the fancy toilet

Toto Washlet control panel- very interesting

The meal options were plentiful, and Ky enjoyed making all her meal selections; the food was quite good for a hospital. Not only did we get breakfast, lunch, and dinner, we also had afternoon and evening tea.

I chose the Malay meal for lunch one day: Malay Chicken Soup, Ikan Goring Bumbu Achar Kuning (Wok-Fried Fish with Tumeric and Pickled Vegetables), Fragrant Steamed Rice, & Chinese Endive (which came with the oh-so-traditional Marble Cheesecake)

Ky’s lunch pick was the Chinese meal: Cantonese Beef Hor Fun (Flat Rice Noodles, Lean Beef, & Green Vegetable in Thick Gravy) and, of course, the Marble Cheesecake- probably Ky’s favorite food item during our stay

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

It turned out that the only room available was an isolation room. After making sure that this did not mean we had to adhere to any of the isolation rules, and that it was purely a matter of the physical structure of the space, I agreed that that would be fine. It ended up being great- because we had a double set of sliding glass doors, we didn’t hear any noise from the hall. We had a corner room, which made it even nicer.

Almost everyone who cared for Kylie wore a mask. In Asia, lots of people on the street wear masks; our understanding is that if they are not feeling well, they wear a mask to prevent spreading what they have to others, which seems very considerate. In the hospital setting, I have to imagine it’s more for the opposite reason, to prevent catching anything, but that seems reasonable. However, let me just say that it definitely does not enhance one’s ability to understand a person’s heavily-accented English when unable to see that person’s lips moving. Ky and I did a lot of careful listening, and I played the interpreter for her quite frequently. We were fortunate to receive very friendly, competent care during our brief hospital stay.

The funniest aspect to the medical care Ky received was the terminology for a certain bodily function. The first time a nurse asked Kylie if she had “passed motion” yet, we just looked at each other. I realized what was being asked and mouthed “pooped” to Kylie, who looked shocked that that was worthy of discussion in the first place, she not being familiar with hospital protocol of keeping track of such things. Watching Ky have to reluctantly answer that question repeatedly, with the nurses consistently using that same terminology, always resulted in a chuckle when we were on our own in the room once again.

Another item of note is that we had to deal in degrees Celsius when it came to body temperature. After 11 years of parenthood, I am very accustomed to responding to fevers based on the Fahrenheit scale. When the school nurse called me last Monday afternoon to tell me that Ky was in her office and that her temperature was 39.2 degrees Celsius, I don’t think I provided her with an immediate response that she felt was worthy of the temperature we were dealing with (which was 102.5 degrees Fahrenheit, for the record- significant, but not out of control, and not the highest it had been since Ky got sick). While my conversions have become pretty good when quickly approximating the temperature required to heat my oven and adjust my thermostat, I wasn’t quite ready with an immediate Fahrenheit equivalent down to a tenth of a degree when I answered the phone. After this experience, however, I’m better prepared for the next time I need to deal with a Celsius fever.

Kylie was supposed to stay in the hospital for two nights, but our pediatrician surprised us with a late-night visit on the second evening and offered to discharge her after one last round of IV meds. That sounded good to us, so we walked out of the hospital at 10 o’clock that night, and I do mean that Kylie literally walked out, which is something that would never have happened back home. I explained to Ky that in the U.S., it doesn’t matter what you’ve been in for- the patient receives a wheelchair ride out the door regardless. This seemed almost unceremonious by comparison, but it sure was quicker!

So, that’s the latest in our list of Asian adventures. I need to thank my wonderful friend and neighbor, Molly, who saved us by watching Jenna and Logan as needed; one of the hardest parts about moving away has been losing our safety net of family and friends, and it really helps knowing that we have found our people here in Singapore as well. Additionally, my brother Tim, who is now a doctor (after graduating from med school last week- so proud of him!), provided me with much-appreciated, U.S.-based medical advice throughout this little adventure. Finally, Kylie was amazed by all of the well-wishes she received, including some fantastic cards from her friends and teachers. Emails from family and friends at home made her smile. Thanks to all!

 

9 Months Down- Our Quarterly Review

Not only is it time for another quarterly update (and let me just apologize for the fact that my most recent post prior to this was last quarter’s update- ridiculous), but we’ve now also reached the anniversary of Brad’s fateful phone call last spring, telling me to get a bottle of wine ready because he was headed home from work, and we had something big to discuss when he arrived. It was the Thursday before Mother’s Day, so we then spent Mother’s Day weekend informing our moms (and our dads, of course) that we were quite possibly going to be moving their grandkids a world away from them- Happy Mother’s Day! After that came a strange period of being in limbo, waiting for details of this proposed move to trickle in, so that we would have enough information to make the call- should we accept the challenge and start the adventure or stay the course and hope not to be penalized for doing so? By early June, we had decided to go for it and were in a race against time to be ready to move to Singapore by early August. The fact that we began all of this a year ago is absolutely amazing to me.

I feel like this 9-month mark is almost more significant than the anniversary of our move will be. The kids are fast-approaching the end of the school year, and we have our highly-anticipated summer visit to the U.S. on the horizon. My mother-in-law recently asked me if Singapore feels like home now, and I responded that it’s where I picture going when we’re returning from a trip, so to a certain extent, it does feel like home. We have settled into a classification system whereby we call our Singapore condo “home,” and we call the greater-Chicagoland area “home-home.” (I think the turning point for everybody was the sale of our house; it’s not like we can just return to Libertyville now and pick up exactly where we left off- there is no house to return to, though it’s definitely still home-home to us.)

I am so proud of the kids for adjusting to their new lives so well. All 3 of them have made great friends here. Poor Jenna had to say goodbye to her best school friend, Rina, a few months ago, when Rina’s family suddenly moved back to Japan. Jenna was very sad but has adapted, and that experience taught me a lesson- given the transitory nature of most people’s stays in Singapore, don’t wait when it comes to making plans because you just never know how long people will be here. With Rina, I had never met her parents, and her mom didn’t speak English; given how busy life with 3 kids can be, and how many friends our kids have right here in our condo, I had never pursued having Rina over for a playdate. I assumed we’d have time for that in the future. Luckily, we had just enough notice of her upcoming move to arrange to have her over for a full day of play during her last weekend in Singapore back in March. Her father turned out to be the nicest man, and since he is still working in Singapore for a bit, Jenna hopes to have a chance to see Rina when she comes to visit her dad here at some point. I had some photos that I’d taken of Jenna & Rina throughout the school year, and I took a bunch more the day that Rina came over to play. We then gave Rina a photo album with all of those pictures in it, and I gave Jenna an identical album, which really seemed to help Jen handle the situation. She still misses Rina a lot, but she has continued to strengthen her friendships with many other girls in her class, so she’s doing OK.

Jenna & Rina, so cute together

Logan continues to thrive in Singapore. He is currently a 4-sport athlete, participating in an after-school basketball program, taking swim lessons with Jenna in the condo pool, and spending his Saturdays playing soccer and baseball. He has loved kindergarten, and he has turned into quite the reader. He and his best friend Nico are engaged in a friendly competition to see who can get farthest along in the alphabet-based rankings that measure their reading proficiency. I help with math in his classroom every Friday, and Logan’s group is full of Star Wars-loving boys who keep me on my toes. I got to observe his Spanish class recently, and I love that he’s come so far with it at the age of 6. Most interestingly this school year, Logan has been playing the cello (Suzuki lessons in violin or cello are provided weekly for all kindergarteners), and we were just discussing over the weekend how much he enjoys the cello and how he really wants to continue to play next year. He has a concert coming up soon that Brad & I are very much looking forward to attending. Given that this was his first year of elementary school, he has certainly embraced all that it has to offer.

Logan was thrilled to play catcher for the first time on Saturday- all that gear really appeals to him

Kylie had quite an experience at the end of March, when her class spent 5 days at camp in Thailand. Yes, I put my child on a plane, to fly to another country without me, and then I had no direct contact with her for 5 whole days. Parents received updates by email each morning, with a group photo from the day before and a little blurb about what the group had spent that day doing. Ky went to an orphanage, where she had fun playing with one 18-month-old boy in particular. She also went to a prosthetics plant, an organic farm, and hiked up to a mountain village. She went to a night market, where she practiced her bargaining skills. She did jungle cooking one day, making her lunch over an open flame. Though she didn’t mention it right away upon her return, she had the “opportunity” to try eating an ant; apparently, the type that she ate has a distinct citrusy taste that one of their guides thought they would enjoy. I was unaware that she would come back ready to find food Survivor-style! Her school group was spread throughout the plane on their flights, and during one of the flights, Ky found herself between two women who were not affiliated with the school; both ladies were very nice, but Ky was a bit offended when the one well-meaning woman wanted to order Ky’s food and beverages for her. Kylie definitely embraced the independence-building nature of camp, from packing her own suitcase before the trip (as mandated by the teachers) to wanting to deal with the flight attendants herself on the flights there and back. She returned exhausted but thrilled by the whole experience. (I’m so happy that she had the opportunity to go, but I’m also so happy that we’ve checked that experience off the list; at home, a field trip to Chicago or Milwaukee, an hour away from Libertyville, was a big deal!)

Ky in Thailand

Happily, Brad’s travel has slowed down, and he hasn’t had to make a trip back to the U.S. since February. His conference calls at night are going strong, though, so he still spends the bulk of each evening (many nights until midnight or even 2 a.m.) on the phone, the poor guy. We don’t have an office, so he does his work from the couch. This continues to provide its challenges; cleaning up the kitchen and getting the kids to bed has to be done very quietly. I’m sure that some of our domestic noise makes its way through- I just always hope that it won’t be anything too embarrassing. (With Jenna and Logan sharing the hall bathroom that’s just off the family room/dining room/kitchen, it’s a realistic concern to have.)

Some other aspects of life in Singapore that are wearing on us a bit at the moment:

(1) The weather, which I’d been more positive about in my last review, coming off the slightly cooler winter months- the heat and humidity are back with a vengeance, and it’s thick out there, like soup.

(2) Termites, a new issue of late- apparently, this is the time of year for them, and they are very attracted to the light. When half your kitchen is open-air, this is a problem. Again, what is wrong with screens?

(3) Mold & mold mites, thanks to having our A/C on constantly- I spent a whole week this spring wiping down walls with a clove oil solution to eliminate the yellow mold and the harmless but gross little mites that feed off of it. As a result, the condo had a holiday-like scent to it for weeks.

(4) Cab drivers- I always seem to find the ones who are so picky about where they’re willing to drive a person, usually because their shift is ending shortly. Seriously, how many shift changes are there? I hate the rejection and the ensuing panic that I won’t get where I need to be on time if one of them doesn’t take pity on me and let me pay him to take me there, as one would expect cab drivers to want to do; I am not above begging. We continue to prefer the train and the bus, but some of the kids’ activities are in locations that are best reached by cab.

(5) Rules- my personality lends itself well to being a rule-follower, but this place has more rules than one would think possible. Within our condo complex alone, the rules can make you want to tear your hair out- where you can and can’t eat (given your proximity to the pool), how far in advance you can book the tennis court or the function room, what toys can be brought into the pool, where the kids can use their scooters, what the kids need to be wearing to play at the playground, etc.  There is no room for thinking outside the box or employing logic to decide the most reasonable course of action; for expats, this can be particularly frustrating.

(6) Sidewalk etiquette- if you are walking with an umbrella up to shade yourself from the sun and are also busy texting on your phone, it is unlikely that you will be walking in a straight line or moving at a reasonable pace. Believe it or not, this can be very frustrating for those trying to get around you. Also, if you are walking four-abreast, and there is a single person approaching you, common sense would dictate that at least one person in your group should move out of the way, rather than expecting the individual headed toward you to hop off the sidewalk at the last moment to avoid a collision. Can you tell which person I am in these scenarios?

Then, there are the scratch-your-head moments that can occur in Singapore. Just for fun, check out this sign that was posted at the Little India train station yesterday:

I’m still not sure what “hoarding works” are; there is some ongoing construction at that station, and there was an area that was barricaded, but I think something may have been lost in the translation.

Most exciting since my last post, we were lucky enough to have our second set of visitors from home arrive here in April. The kids and I hadn’t seen any family members since Brad’s cousin Kathy came to see us in October, so we were thrilled to have Brad’s parents arrive on 4/8 to spend 2 weeks with us. I will post more about their visit at a later date (hopefully not too much later, but we’ll see how it goes- my track record lately is obviously not great). We had a wonderful time showing Grandma Sandy & Grandpa Bobby around Singapore, and the spring break trip we took with them to Vietnam was fantastic. The picture at the top of the post is from that trip, taken in Halong Bay. The boat behind us is the junk boat on which we took a 3-day, 2-night cruise.

When we decided to move to Singapore, our goal was to really take advantage of our new Asian home-base and travel as much as possible. We have been very lucky to have the chance to see many new places during the 9 months we’ve lived here. We’ve been to Malaysia twice (Batu Batu on Pulau Tengah, as detailed in a January post, and Johor Bahru, which is just over the border, to go to Legoland), New Zealand, and Vietnam. Kylie went to Thailand. Brad has been all over Asia for work. We still have a trip to Cambodia to squeeze in before the end of the school year. I feel like our kids are going to return to Chicago with such a broad view of the world, and that alone has made the last 9 months worth it. That being said, the best trip of all is coming soon- home-home awaits!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

State of the Skibitzkis, 6 Months In

Yesterday was the 6-month anniversary of our arrival in Singapore, so it’s time for another quarterly review. How are we feeling at this point? My thoughts on this situation can change every 20 minutes or so. Any of you who read my last post, detailing Logan’s Christmas wish for Santa, know that the missing-our-family-and-friends-like-crazy part of this is not ever going to change for us, regardless of the amount of time spent away. I keep telling Brad that I am not built for having this many long-distance relationships. Not only am I missing everyone at home, he is away so much that after nearly 15 years of marriage, I’m still just trying to consistently live in the same place as my husband! However, with each day we spend here, my appreciation for this experience deepens. It is the hardest thing I’ve ever done, but as I watch my 3 kids navigate this life in Asia, I am positive that this experience is enriching their lives in innumerable ways.

About 3 weeks ago, we were walking around Chinatown when Kylie commented on how nice it is not to be the new kid anymore. Over the course of the past several months, we’ve seen quite a bit of turnover at our condo building, as the original renters’ 2-year leases have been expiring. The kids have enjoyed watching new families move in, giving me updates on how many kids they’ve spotted and what they’ve seen being unpacked as they watch the other condos out of the girls’ bedroom windows (a little stalker-ish, perhaps, but it keeps them busy). Additionally, the new year brought many new faces at school. In Kylie’s grade, there’s a whole new class of kids. Watching them learn the routine has made Ky realize just how much she has figured out and gotten used to in the time we’ve been in Singapore. The same day as our Chinatown conversation, Brad & I watched Logan lead the way in a big, busy train station that he has only been to very occasionally, and we were so impressed by how confidently he navigated his way through. A few days ago, Ky had a meeting after school and took the train by herself for the first time afterward; Jenna, Logan, & I met her when she got off the train to take the bus together the rest of the way home. (I’m sure she could have handled the bus on her own as well, and she was more than willing to do so, but her mother needed to take baby steps. And, before any grandmas hyperventilate while reading this, I can’t stress enough how safe Singapore is. I’m certainly not going to stick her alone on the ‘L’ back in Chicago.) I was so proud of her when I saw her leaning against the train station wall, calmly waiting for us to arrive. (We were early, but she was earlier.)

School continues to go well for everybody. Jenna had a classmate’s birthday party at Wild, Wild, Wet, a local waterpark, a few weeks ago, and watching her happily run around with her big, very international group of friends was terrific.

Riding the Ular-Lah

Brazil, Japan, & the U.S. are represented in this photo

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Logan’s teacher recently sent out iMovies that each child in his class had made using their iPads, after receiving an iMovie tutorial. Their subject was a 3D printer that had been set up in their kindergarten classroom. They filmed the printer making a pink, plastic bracelet, and I loved listening to Logan narrate the event on his video and marveled at what a great opportunity that was for him. I continue to try to chaperone as many of the kids’ field trips as possible, and the most recent one I went on was with Kylie’s class. We went to 4 different places of worship as part of their world religions unit. That day warrants its own post, but suffice it to say, it was a very educational trip and was certainly an experience that Ky & I will not forget.

While I remain determined not to overbook us here like we were back home, with a crazy number of activities crammed into each week, we are now branching out and selectively adding activities to our schedule. The kids have all participated in CCAs (Co-Curricular Activities) at school. Initially, this was all that they did. The first CCA term saw Kylie in a woodwind ensemble, Jenna in yoga, and Logan in soccer. Each of these took place once per week after school and was 30 minutes long. Jen enjoyed the yoga, Lo liked the soccer but wanted a more intense training experience, and Ky found herself uncomfortable in a band setting with some very accomplished Asian musicians, who had all been playing their instruments for far longer than the year she had been playing her flute. When the second CCA term rolled around, Ky switched to Continental Math (to participate in math contests just like ones she had taken part in at her school back home), Jen picked gymnastics (which is one of a few longer CCAs, going for an hour and twenty minutes each time, which seems more reasonable than the very brief half-hour that most of them are), and Lo opted not to do any because he was interested in signing up for more sports outside of school and also because he just wanted to come home and see me after school (understandable, given that he’s 6). Additionally, Logan played baseball later on in the fall on Saturday afternoons. That was all we did, and it was deliberate on my part. Now, however, our 6-month settling-in hiatus is over, and we are getting back into the swing of things.

After his first day at soccer, ready to join in the fun at the waterpark

Logan is now playing soccer (or football, as many call it here), and he and Jenna have just started swim lessons. Swim lessons in Singapore are a beautiful thing. At home right now, we’d be heading out into the frigid cold and snow to get to swim lessons, dealing with all the winter gear and trying to dry wet hair before going back outside afterward; here, the kids can go downstairs in their suits and meet their teacher right at our pool. I get to watch them from a lounge chair. It is awesome. Other activities are not nearly as easy; Logan’s other sports options are nowhere near where we live, so it is a big time investment when you factor in transportation. However, I’ve been really impressed by the quality of all that we’ve tried thus far, and he loves participating. (Incidentally, this sports-obsessed son of mine is now into cricket, thanks to his friends at the condo. I know nothing about cricket and its terminology, but Logan recently came upstairs, thrilled that he “got a wicket,” which he assured me was really good. I’ll have to take his word for it. He cracks me up.)

When I wrote our 1st quarter review, we were about to begin traveling. Since then, we’ve been to Batu Batu and New Zealand (I know, I know- NZ pics & details coming soon!), and both trips were great successes. We have a number of other trips in the works; I am officially a TripAdvisor addict and am starting to feel like a travel agent, in the best of ways. It is so exciting for me to develop an itinerary and really delve into the details of a new place. It is often overwhelming at first, and it’s amazing as it all comes together into one cohesive plan. We are eagerly anticipating a visit from my in-laws and a trip to Vietnam with them this spring. When we left in August, Brad’s parents’ trip seemed so far off that it offered little solace; now, time with Grandma & Grandpa is definitely starting to feel like a reality for the kids, and it is beyond exciting for all of us. So, the adventure continues on the travel front.

Perhaps the nicest surprise since my last quarterly review has been the weather. The monsoon season began in earnest in November, and it rained most days in November and December, particularly in the afternoon. Since returning from our Christmas break trip, however, it has been less rainy and cooler/breezier. My friend Niki had told me back in December that January and February are lovely in Singapore, but I have to admit, I didn’t really believe that it would be much different. She was right, though- I’ve been finding it to be quite pleasant. (I still don’t ever have a good hair day, mind you, and “cooler” does not mean cool- just to clarify.) We purchased an outdoor love seat for our balcony that was delivered last month, and it has become our favorite place to be in the condo. It gives us some extra living space, and it was great that its arrival coincided with the nicer weather. While we really miss Chicago, we don’t miss much about the Chicago winter; for now, we’ll take this.

We completed the sale of our house in Libertyville at the beginning of December, so that has been a big change this quarter. We no longer have a home to return to in the U.S., which is such a strange feeling. The day that we closed on the house, my announcement to the kids that it was a done deal was met with a collective groan. For Brad and me, it was definitely a relief. Trying to deal with house-related issues from across the world was difficult, and the month leading up to the sale was particularly stressful, as we tried to get everything in order. We had a lot of assistance back home to make sure that all went smoothly- thank you again to everyone who helped us out. Now that we’ve had a few months to process the situation, I can’t even imagine still having the house, as fond as I was of it. However, I did have a dream the other night that I was back home, in my kitchen, and I didn’t want to wake up and have the dream end. The kids still bring up the house all the time, and Logan wants windows just like he had in his bedroom at home, “when we go back to America.” For now, though, we just have this condo to deal with. I actually need to make an appointment with my A/C guys to come take care of our quarterly servicing; that’s how frequently it needs to be done in a climate like this!

I asked the kids yesterday morning for their thoughts on being in Singapore at this point. Logan went with, “I’m sad our family doesn’t live here.” I thought that was interesting because he didn’t say he needed to be back at home, he said he wanted his family here- hmmm. Jenna said that the time has gone by “really, really, really fast,” but that she misses our family because they’re so far away, and she doesn’t like that Brad’s always traveling. She also feels that it’s hard to talk to our family at home; I’m not sure if she meant physically (which is true, due to both the 14-hour time difference and connection issues) or emotionally (which is obviously rough). Ky’s thoughts were that she’s happy to have lots of friends of all different nationalities here, that language is sometimes a barrier (as with a kind, older Chinese woman who tried to talk to her at the train station on Tuesday), and that her foot hurts (due to an unplanned dip in the pool Tuesday night when she tripped while walking on the raised ledge that surrounds it). Brad says that he feels like he never left home (as he happens to be in Chicago at the moment- funny guy).

So, that’s where we stand at the 6-month mark. Going back to my conversation with Kylie about not being the new kid any longer, the conclusion we reached was that knowing that we were able to move here and figure it all (or enough of it, anyway) out has given us the confidence to know that we can deal with any new situation.

Jen’s & my deep dish, ready to go into the oven

We still miss things like Chicago-style pizza, but we can adapt; check out these pics of the pizza-making session the kids and I had over the weekend. Jen had been feeling desperate for deep dish, so we found a recipe and made our own. We’re making it work!

 

The finished product- delicious!

Ky prefers thin crust, and that’s what Lo decided on as well

Hard at work

I have a feeling we’ll be doing this regularly now- it was a hit!

 

 

 

Christmas Addendum

As a quick follow-up to my Christmas post, the letter to Santa pictured above is what my little, blond buddy brought home from school today. It looks like it had been hanging up on the wall in his classroom, and I’m glad I didn’t see it until now, when we are past the holidays and looking ahead to our visit home this summer. When Logan handed this to me, I initially glanced at the address on the right side of the postcard, saw it was addressed to Santa, and expected to see a request for Star Wars Legos or Transformers on the left, the most coveted items in his 6-year-old world. Instead, in case you can’t make it all out in the picture, I saw that he’d written this:

Dear Santa, 

Can you send some of my family for Christmas?

Love, 

Logan

Whoa. I think I may have stopped breathing for a second when I read this. It both broke my heart and made me proud- my guy has figured out what’s really important. (This certainly does not ease Mommy’s guilt over temporarily rocking his world and moving him away from his cherished extended family.) That’s all I have for today; I think Logan’s letter is plenty.

Our “Orphan” Christmas

Decorations went up the first week of November; I find the “Extra Virgin” sign in the background (for a pizza place) to be rather humorous

Just like at home, Christmas preparations begin early in Singapore. With no Thanksgiving holiday here, the transition from Halloween (which is of limited popularity) to Christmas is even quicker. There is a musician who performs in the tunnel leading to the train station nearby, and when he started singing “Silver Bells” right around Halloween, as we were sweating in the stifling humidity while passing him, I was so not in the mood. Listening to “It’s Beginning to Look a Lot Like Christmas” while grocery shopping was equally strange, since it didn’t look anything like Christmas to me! The kids were quite confused by the hot pink holiday decorations on Orchard Road, which is the Singapore equivalent of Chicago’s Michigan Avenue. The tree pictured to the right was more traditional-looking, much to the kids’ relief.

Despite my early lack of enthusiasm, back in October, while shopping at Ikea (of which there are 2 in Singapore), we bought a little Christmas tree. All of our usual decorations are at home in storage, so we were starting with absolutely nothing. We found this tree for $45; it’s the same height as me (so not very tall!), and comes with its own carrying case- perfect for storing in our condo. We had a great time that day choosing a color scheme (red and white) and selecting ornaments for our Swedish-Singaporean tree. That family activity actually ended up being one of my favorite memories of this first Christmas in Singapore.

Our cute little tree

I should also mention that Christmas lights in Asia are interesting. I bought a strand at a pop-up Christmas store at the mall next-door, and what we call white lights are called yellow lights here. Luckily, I realized this as I was about to pay, and we ended up with the “yellow” lights we were hoping for. Additionally, these were the craziest Christmas lights I’ve ever seen; there were 8 or 10 settings on our strand, from twinkling, to fading, to a strobe-like effect that had the kids yelling at me to please turn the lights off because they were hurting their eyes. The constant light that we were looking for was, of course, the very last setting, and we never knew if it would start on that setting each night when we turned the lights on, or if it would revert to the first setting, requiring us to cycle through each of the more obnoxious options. Regardless, when we put the tree up the first week of December, we all agreed that it was the perfect tree for our current situation.

We had decided even before the big move that we would not be heading home for the holidays. It’s about 25 hours door-to-door, so it’s not a trip to be taken lightly with 3 kids. I also knew that given how traumatic it was to say goodbye in August, the kids and I were just not up for doing that again 5 months later, no matter how desperately we missed everyone. (Brad has to travel back to the U.S. for work, so he gets some visits in; the rest of us don’t handle that particularly well either, but that’s a post for a different day.)  One of my grandmas is suffering from dementia, and every conversation I had with her while we prepared to move and then up until Christmas included her asking if we’d be home for Christmas (usually several times per conversation); having to repeatedly tell her that we wouldn’t be back to visit until summer, and having her be surprised and disappointed all over again, was continually heart-breaking. It was, however, the right decision.

Logan liked the decorated boats at Clarke Quay (you can barely see him in this pic)

With Christmas approaching, we had to figure out how to celebrate. At home, we spend Christmas Eve with my family and attend either our church or my parents’ church at the end of the night. Christmas morning finds us at our house, doing the Santa-thing with the kids. We then head to Brad’s parents’ house to spend Christmas Day with his family. We decided that for our inaugural Christmas in Singapore, we should go out for dinner on Christmas Eve and then try to find a church service to attend. So, we went out for Hainanese chicken rice, which is a national dish of Singapore that is enormously popular; it consists of steamed or roasted chicken in a soy-based sauce, flavored rice, cucumber and cilantro garnish, and soy sauce/chili sauce/ginger paste/jalapeños as condiments. It is accompanied by a delicious chicken broth for soup, and we like to order Asian greens or broccoli with it as well.

Ready for chicken rice!

 

 

Serving the soup

 

 

 

 

 

Our Christmas Eve meal

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

We then ended up going to the Baptist church next-door to our condo. Finding a service to attend was a little trickier than I’d anticipated; initially, I’d planned to try a Methodist church that I pass on my running route, but they didn’t have an English-speaking Christmas Eve service. Since I didn’t think attending their Christmas morning service would work as well, we took a look at the Baptist church, and they did have an English-speaking option on Christmas Eve.

Dressed up and ready for church

We actually were a bit over-dressed, as it turned out

We were greeted very warmly and got to meet the minister. Much to Jenna’s delight, they presented us with a tin of cookies (which she wondered if they wanted us to eat during the service) and also little goodie bags for the kids. I wouldn’t have been able to discern that it was a Baptist service versus that of any other Protestant denomination. There were some new verses to familiar hymns and some different wording in the scripture readings. There was no choir, just a few song-leaders. (Boy, did I miss the First Pres music that we so enjoy at home!) They did use a multi-media approach, similar to our more contemporary chapel service at home. We were quite conspicuous to be sure; while I don’t particularly enjoy the additional attention in situations like this, I do think it’s a valuable lesson for all of us. A lovely woman who is a member of the church sat with us, and her husband and daughter were both involved in the service. It was a long evening, as the service began at 7:30 and didn’t conclude until about 9:15. The congregation couldn’t have been more welcoming, and I’m glad we went, but I also found it very difficult, picturing us at Christmases past, both at our own church in the midst of friends and at my parents’ church, sitting with my family. This definitely did not feel normal. When we finally got back to the condo, we were able to FaceTime with my sister-in-law, Tracy, and my 1-year-old nephew, Chase. We’d been trying to talk to our family throughout that week, as opportunities presented themselves. Chase was in fine form, showing us his new tricks and providing us with some much-needed entertainment. After that call, we got everybody into bed, at which point Jenna made the comment that I shared on Facebook that night, saying, “Mommy, this is the strangest Christmas we’ve ever had.” It sure was.

The mood improved on Christmas morning. Santa found Kylie, Jenna, & Logan in Singapore (after much speculation and a number of theories as to how he’d make his entrance in the absence of a chimney; the balcony was deemed a great spot for the reindeer), and the gifts under the tree were a big hit. We FaceTimed with Brad’s parents, completing our round of Christmas-week calls to family.

Christmas morning

Present-opening!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Ready to go see their friends for Christmas dinner

 

Then, we joined our condo friends who were also here for Christmas down in the function room next to the pool for a midday “Orphan Christmas” dinner, as it was being referred to by my Aussie friend Kylie. (This is the only other Kylie I’ve ever known, and it seemed so funny at first.) It was an Australian/British/American event, and we all brought dishes to share.

Jenna, enjoying the appetizers, and a good shot of Kylie B.’s reindeer hairdo

 

Our Christmas feast

 

 

 

 

 

Christmas pudding

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

There were 5 families (2 from “Oz,” 1 from England, & 2 from the U.S.), totaling 21 people. The kids had a great time sitting at their own table and then running around outside.

Lots of kids!

The adults all participated in a “Yankee Swap,” which was essentially the same as the grab bag we usually do with my family. I would just like to say thank you to Kylie, Lee, Niki, Molly, and all of their beautiful families- that gathering made our Christmas, for sure.

Most of the kiddos

The adults

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

While our friends continued the party out by the pool, the 5 of us had a trip to get ready for. As I’ve mentioned previously, the opportunity to travel to places we otherwise would not be visiting at this point in our lives, if ever, was a huge part of the draw for us when Brad was offered his current position. With the kids having a 3-week Christmas break, we decided to take advantage of their time off and booked a trip to New Zealand. Our flight to Auckland departed Singapore at 8:30 p.m. on Christmas Day. So, after our fun dinner, we finished up our packing and hopped on the train with our suitcases, headed for the airport. It’s a 10-hour flight to New Zealand, so the late-evening departure was perfect, since everyone was tired and ready to sleep. We flew Singapore Airlines, which was a first for all of us but Brad; they are known for their service, and they even had the cabin decorated for Christmas. So, ultimately, a merry Christmas was had by all!

 

 

 

Beautiful, Beautiful Batu Batu

Happy New Year! Now that 2015 is underway, my resolution is to get caught up with my blog. All the birthdays, holidays, and travel the past 2 months put me way behind with my posts, so here we go! Since I left off with Halloween, I’m going to pick up with Thanksgiving:

Thanksgiving is my favorite holiday. I love everything about it: being with our family, the meal itself, the concept of taking time to be thankful for what we have (and not having it be commercial in any way)… it just makes me very happy. Thanksgiving this year, however, was not traditional in the least. Aside from the 5 of us, there was not a family member in sight. There was no turkey dinner (though the kids did get a turkey lunch at school the day before Thanksgiving). Aside from me going in to the kids’ school that week and reading a Thanksgiving book to the girls’ classes (as this holiday is a foreign concept to most of the other students and many of the faculty as well), plus the package of Thanksgiving cards that my mom sent, there was nothing to mark the holiday itself, aside from the fact that the kids had 2 days off of school. When we talked about moving to Singapore, I dreaded the thought of Thanksgiving. So, how did we handle it? We went on our first vacation in Asia!

When I read through all the Singapore expat blogs I could find as we considered moving here, I found mention of an island off the coast of Malaysia. The name of the island is Pulau Tengah (“Middle Island”), and the only thing on the island is a resort called Batu Batu. In fact, when people refer to this destination, they simply say that they’re going to Batu Batu. Anyway, I saw pictures and read descriptions of the resort, which I immediately shared with Brad, Kylie, Jenna, & Logan. Batu Batu became something of a rallying cry for us. We decided that if we made the move, we would spend Thanksgiving at Batu Batu. Whenever one of us was upset about the move, another of us would just say, “Batu Batu.” The point was that we were going to do something to take our minds off of missing home, and we felt like this destination would cheer us up.

Shortly after we arrived in Singapore, Brad & I made the reservation. I didn’t want to take any chances that this trip wouldn’t happen over Thanksgiving because we’d promised that we’d do this. Since we don’t have a car, we made arrangements for a minivan and driver to come collect us at 6 a.m. on that Thursday. We used JK Express, recommended by the resort, and it worked out great. With some of the companies, we would have had to switch vehicles at the Malaysian border (which is about 20 minutes away from our condo), but with JK, we didn’t have to. We were told to allow 4 hours to get to Mersing, Johor, Malaysia, but we arrived in 2.5, as traffic that early in the day was very light, and going through customs was a breeze. Because we were so early, we had plenty of time to kill at the Mersing jetty. Our driver, Mr. Jacky, suggested that we get some breakfast at the coffee (“kopi”) house that was right at the jetty. We said goodbye to him and moved our luggage over to a table at the restaurant.

The girls and I decided to locate the rest room, which turned into something of an adventure. We found it, and saw that there was an attendant stationed outside; he didn’t speak much English, but there was another man talking to him right then, and that man explained that there was a fee to use the facilities. We went back to the boys, got some change from Brad, and went back to pay. I’m still not positive what the situation was in the stalls; we determined that we had to go back to the attendant to get toilet paper, but then the toilets didn’t flush- it was all very confusing. We did our best to figure out the system and then hurried back to have some breakfast. Brad and Logan were waiting for us at the table, hanging out with all the stray cats that keep the restaurant patrons company. Ky was excited about this, but Jen & Lo were a bit nervous. I’m not typically a fan of cats, but they turned out to be very sweet animals who just wanted to eat our crumbs and snooze by our feet; Jen & Lo ended up loving them.

We had a traditional Malaysian breakfast of nasi lemak (me) and roti prata (everybody else). Both are very common in Singapore as well, and we’d had roti prata on several occasions prior to this. The kids’ favorite part of this meal was the sweetened iced tea with milk; it was delicious.

From Wikipedia: “Roti prata is a fried flour-based pancake that is cooked over a flat grill. It is usually served with a vegetable or meat based curry and is from Malaysia and Singapore. Prata is also commonly cooked (upon request) with cheese, onion, banana, red bean, chocolate, mushroom or egg. It is listed at number 45 on World’s 50 most delicious foods readers’ poll compiled by CNN Go in 2011.”

From Wikipedia: “Nasi lemak (Jawi: ناسي لمق) is a fragrant rice dish cooked in coconut milk and “pandan” leaf commonly found in Malaysia, where it is considered the national dish…Traditionally, nasi lemak is served with various side dishes, including fresh cucumber slices, small fried anchovies (ikan bilis), roasted peanuts, hard boiled egg, and hot spicy sauce (sambal).”

After finishing our yummy meal and watching the cats some more, we were anxious to figure out how exactly the boat ride was going to work that would get us over to the island. As it turned out, a Batu Batu employee in a blue shirt found us and explained that we could actually get on an earlier boat, which was great. We headed over to it and ended up talking to another family from Singapore whose 2 kids attend the same school as ours; they’ve been in Asia for awhile and provided us with more travel ideas. The boat was soon underway, and 20 minutes later, we’d arrived.

We were immediately greeted by another employee, who walked with us to the restaurant pavilion, while explaining all that we needed to know about the resort. Every employee we passed smiled and said hello; I know they were paid to do so, but I’ve become accustomed to Singapore, where people (regardless of employment) generally do not smile and exchange pleasantries. This was such a welcome change; it felt so much more normal. Anyway, we were presented with a warm wash cloth and a welcome drink; we got to sit and enjoy the view for a few minutes while sipping our beverages. We’d been a bit nervous that we booked this trip during monsoon season, but the weather was gorgeous- warm, sunny, and not nearly as humid as Singapore.

Soon it was time to be shown to our room, which was a villa right on the beach.

A sandy path connects the villas and restaurant pavilion; it was raked frequently to keep it neat. That’s Brad and the kids in the distance.

This was the front of our villa. With all the sand, it was a good thing we had a place to rinse our feet before heading inside, which Jen is doing in this pic.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

The main room was our bedroom, which had an extra bed for 1 of the kids; additionally, there was a kids’ annex right off the bedroom that had bunk beds for the other 2. (Thus, a nightly rotation was established, as each child needed a turn sleeping on the top bunk. Luckily, we had 3 nights to work with.) There was a large bathroom that was great, aside from some nighttime ant visitors- the price you pay for being right on the beach, I suppose.

Main room of the villa: our bed and 1 of the kids’ beds

Children’s annex

Tub in our big bathroom

Sink area in the bathroom

Shower and toilet area in the bathroom

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

The best part- the back of the villa and access to the South China Sea, just steps from our back porch:

Back porch

Back of the villa

Our backyard

We had Sunrise Beach to ourselves most of the time

Being at Batu Batu was a little like luxury camp. Meals were served during certain windows. We always had the same table, and we could come and go as we pleased. All guests pay a full-board fee ahead of time, so the only additional purchases are beverages. Breakfast was a buffet- nothing out of the ordinary, but definitely sufficient. Lunch and dinner, however, were fantastic. For adults, lunch was a choice of 3 main-course options and 3 dessert options; for dinner, we also had 3 appetizer options. The kids had 1 option of main and dessert at both lunch and dinner, though the staff was very flexible if these options weren’t going to work for your child; we never had to alter anything, but we saw others who did with no problem.

Entering the restaurant pavilion

Our table

Dinner was our favorite meal, for sure; the kids could begin eating at 6 p.m., and then at 7 p.m., they could go watch a movie at the nearby playhouse. Adult dinner began at 7 p.m. So, Brad & I visited with the kids each evening as they ate their meal, and then they went to watch the movie while we enjoyed our meal. We don’t have a babysitter in Singapore, so we caught up on some much-needed date nights!

My Thanksgiving dinner: Indian-style sea bass

Brad’s Thanksgiving dinner: filet with garlic butter

Lime tart & coconut gelato dessert

Just what we needed

 

We spent our days swimming, snorkeling, paddleboarding, and hiking. There are a number of good beaches for swimming, so we tried them all. We usually ended up back at the villa, at our beach, for awhile before heading off to dinner.

Out for a walk

Headed for Long Beach

It wasn’t so much “paddle”-boarding for Jen

Kylie in the distance, heading out to sea

Logan took to this right away

 

All 3 kids, but particularly Logan, enjoyed climbing all the rocks

Ky, Lo, & Brad enjoying the great snorkeling off of Junior Reef Beach

All 3 kids in the infinity-edge pool

We saw this guy one afternoon while heading back to our villa!

The kids in action, hiking around the perimeter of the island

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Amazingly, from 1977-1981, Tengah Island housed over 100,000 Vietnamese refugees. Given its pristine beauty and small size, this just doesn’t seem possible, though we did see some evidence of prior habitation during our hike around the island. Twenty years later, the island was used on several Survivor-type TV shows. The resort opened in 2012 and is committed to environmentally-friendly practices to preserve its gorgeous natural setting.

Scenic view while hiking

A family shot when we encountered our friends from the boat during our hike

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

In the late afternoon, with dinner approaching, the most amazing thing happens in the villas: turn-down service. This doesn’t just consist of the usual opening-up of the beds; it is a major cleaning of each room, as sand (and lots of it) is an inevitability in such a setting, despite one’s best efforts. They sweep the floors, close the windows, put down the shades, turn on the A/C, turn down the beds, unfurl the mosquito netting around the beds (though we had no issue with mosquitoes in the villa; we only caught a few moths in the netting), turn on a few lights, and just generally make the place look fresh and new. I loved this transformation; it made coming back from dinner so pleasant, as everything was all ready for us.

Before dinner one night

Batu Batu was all that we’d hoped for when we decided it would be just the place for our first Asian vacation. It was convenient, relaxing, and beautiful. We all had a hard time leaving. Perhaps most telling, prior to our trip, one of the kids had asked if we’d go to Batu Batu for Thanksgiving next year as well. Brad had been quick to explain that there are so many places that we’d like to see while we’re living in Asia that it’s unlikely that we’ll be going anywhere twice. However, by the end of our first day at Batu Batu, he was trying to figure out how soon we could go back!

Halloween in Singapore, American-Style

As Halloween approached, I got a little nervous. I didn’t have costumes for the kids, and the store here that seemed the most likely candidate at which to find them something turned out not to be great- $50 for really cheap-looking costumes that nobody liked. Additionally, I did not bring any of our fall decorations, which the kids missed. Plus, there was the issue of carving pumpkins. Finally, my 3 love trick-or-treating, and we didn’t know what we were going to do about that. For comparison’s sake, this is what our October looked like last year, taken from my calendar:

Baby Superman is my nephew, Chase, and the furry guy is the kids’ doggy cousin, Apollo, who got to go to the pumpkin patch with us.

Brad ended up having to go back to Chicago at the beginning of October, which was a trip we weren’t anticipating and didn’t have much notice prior to. I quickly pulled up Target’s website (and incidentally, I should have included Target on my list of things I currently miss- it was so frequently a one-stop solution to all the random items I needed; I don’t have that here) and found costumes for Kylie & Logan. Jenna wanted to be Elsa, like every other little girl in her demographic. My mother-in-law spearheaded the costume-purchasing (thanks, Grandma Sandy!) and was able to get Jen & Lo’s costumes in time for Brad to bring back with him. His cousin Kathy came to visit us the following week, and Ky’s costume arrived in time to for Kath to bring it along. It was so strange trying to find costumes that would be cool enough for the kids to wear; at home, we have the opposite problem, trying to figure out how to bundle up while still showing them off.

Nobody else had a Twister costume!

Elsa was not unique, but she was pretty; she also left a trail of glitter in her wake

Our Star-Wars-obsessed Jedi knight; his lightsaber had to stay home from school

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

As for decorations, we definitely went simple on those. The kids spent hours making their own, and then they proudly hung them on their bedroom doors and collaborated on my bedroom door. My mom put together a package of Halloween cards for the kids from my side of the family, and those arrived in time to display in our living room. The kids were tickled to receive cards from their grandparents, great-grandmas, and uncles/aunt/cousin. This drove the point home for me that sometimes I put too much pressure on myself at home; these easy decorations were just as exciting for the kids as our big bin of fall decos at home, and they were so proud to have made a bunch of them. I checked that concern off my list and moved on.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Sadly, we did not get to carve pumpkins this year, which I know Brad was all torn up about. Typically, each child picks out a big pumpkin when we go to the pumpkin patch, and then they each design a face for that pumpkin. I assist them in scooping the goop (Brad’s nightmare), and Brad does the carving. I toast the pumpkin seeds, Brad gets the jack-o’-lanterns lit up, and we all admire our creations while sitting in our dark great room. It turned out that a small pumpkin here was going to run us $30, and we would have needed 3, so we nixed that idea. We have plenty of pumpkin-carving years awaiting us when we move back home. The beautiful thing about moving across the world is that you get to make new rules and set new expectations; after being briefly disappointed, the kids accepted this change and quickly moved on.

Ky, J.R., & Chloe before school

Lo, Jen, & Dru before school

 

 

 

 

 

 

Most of the gang at the bus stop

I knew that the kids would be celebrating Halloween at school. It seemed like it was going to be a huge deal, and having been on campus the week of Halloween, I was really impressed with all the decorating that had been done there. However, I was concerned about after school because it’s not Halloween to the typical American child unless trick-or-treating occurs. We always go with our friends the Dulaks (and until they moved a few years ago, the Williams family as well); we were sure to miss those guys a ton. This is our little group on Halloween several years ago:

Logan, Nora, Jenna, Kylie, Avery, Sydney, & Lindsey

So, I started mentioning the possibility of trick-or-treating here to people early in October, trying to gauge their interest. My friend Molly & I decided to try to organize it at the condo. We learned that it’s biggest in the U.S., that it’s not as consistently popular in Australia and England, and that it’s really not an Asian thing at all. When I started asking around, it seemed that almost all of the kids that live in our condo and go to my kids’ school were interested, and most of our expat friends that live here wanted to do it as well.  We could have gone out to the Woodlands area, which is predominantly American, because they have what sounds like over-the-top trick-or-treating in that community. However, it would take us an hour by train, and after a long day at school for the kids, in addition to the fact that Brad was out of town, that just didn’t appeal to me. So, Molly & I ended up with 19 families who were interested in participating; because we asked everyone to spread the word, we even met some families we hadn’t yet encountered. It was so fun because for a number of the kids, it was their first time trick-or-treating ever. Kylie’s good friend Chloe, who is from Korea, had dressed up in the past for a party at her school back home, but this was the first time that she and her brother had gone trick-or-treating. One of the British moms explained to me that trick-or-treating tends to be heavy on the tricks in England (things like fire crackers in mailboxes- yikes!), so it’s not as well-received there; for her daughter, this was also a first.

Logan, Eliza, Kylie, Riya, Jenna, Somya, Aiden, & Chloe- ready to trick-or-treat!

All the families who were participating put a jack-o-lantern sign on their doors, and we provided a list of their condo numbers, so that the kids would know where to go. It’s rainy season here, and sure enough, it was rainy on and off while we trick-or-treated, but that hardly mattered within the confines of the 3 buildings that comprise our condo development. It was hot, particularly as the big group of us that went right after school crammed ourselves into the elevator, but it was a big success.

First time we’ve required an elevator to trick-or-treat!

This is what it looked like inside the elevator- just a bit cramped!

Next year, I’ll focus more on my door decorations; this was very nice, Renee!

Charlotte from Norway really outdid herself; I made the kids stop for a photo op by some of her decos.

Happy kids!

Kylie, Jenna, and Logan were very happy with how the whole thing turned out, and I was relieved that we maintained one of their favorite traditions from home. (This was particularly good because they were disappointed by the school celebration. At home, there’s a big parade at school after lunch, and all of the parents can come see all of the kids in their costumes. That’s followed by a fun assembly and a party in each of the classrooms. Here, while the decorating at school was really awesome, and it was very nice of a group of moms to perform in a “Thriller” flash mob, there was no party, and the kids were left feeling confused by the lack of an actual celebration. And no, I was absolutely not one of those dancing moms, to the surprise of no one.) After trick-or-treating, as always, we ended up with all 3 kids seated at the dining room table, sorting through their candy and enjoying some treats before dinner. They took turns answering the door to hand out candy, and all seemed pretty normal.

Lots of treats

You don’t see these at home: green tea KitKats

We were even able to end the evening in a traditional Halloween way: the kids put on their PJs and settled in to watch It’s the Great Pumpkin, Charlie Brown (thank you, Hulu). We’re calling our first Halloween in Singapore a success!

Unwinding with Charlie Brown

HAPPY HALLOWEEN 2014!

First Quarter Review

Well, guys, we’ve been here for 3 months now! I’ve decided that each quarter, I’ll take a quick survey to see where the 5 of us stand in terms of general satisfaction with the current state of affairs, and then I’ll post the results- a Skibitzki State of the Union address, if you will. As a caveat to all answers recorded below, we all acknowledge without hesitation that the absolute worst part of this move has been being so far away from our family and our friends. I, for one, can hardly think about any of you without getting teary; the same thing happens when I think about the U.S. in general or Libertyville specifically. Therefore, we’ll take that huge negative as a given for all of us, from now until we move back home. In comparison, the rest of this should seem pretty light-hearted.

So, we’ll start with Brad. My questioning of him was the least official, more an offhanded remark about this being our 3-month anniversary in Singapore, and how does he feel about that. The input I received from him was a smart-ass response about how his life is so much less stressful now and how he’s really gotten into a regular exercise routine to boot. (In case there was any doubt, none of that is true. His stress level is sky-high at the moment, and though I did get him to run with me 1 day last week, the only noticeable increase in cardio activity for him in Singapore vs. him at home can be attributed to the fact that he has to walk to and from the train here. Given that he’s seldom in Singapore these days, that’s a marginal improvement at best.)

Moving on to the other male member of the group, Logan proclaimed that the best part of living in Singapore is that he gets to go to school and that there are just so many fun things to do here. Also, he got to to bring all of his LEGOs. The worst/hardest part for him is that he doesn’t “have so many friends here,” as he put it. He does have plenty of friends at school (and seems to be something of an international ladies’ man as well, given the female admirers he’s acquired thus far). He’s really referring to the fact that there are no kindergarten boys in our building, and he’s feeling quite bummed at the moment because his friend Collin, who is an 11-year-old American boy that he has become very attached to here at the condo, is moving home. Collin has been so great with Logan, including him in the group of older boys down at the pool, and Logan is going to miss Collin and Collin’s 2 brothers very much. Finally, something that Logan really misses about home is going out to eat at Casa Bonita. 

Jenna actually didn’t have too much to say when I asked her my questions, which was pretty surprising in and of itself. She said that the best part of living here is hearing people’s accents. (Being the people-watcher that she is, she is fascinated with where everyone is from and what this means in terms of how they look and sound.) Jen really didn’t get past my disclaimer above when thinking about the worst/hardest part about being here; not getting to see our family and friends was what she wanted me to put down for her. What she misses is our house and Panera- the kid is seriously addicted to Panera’s broccoli-cheese soup, so she definitely misses that dining option.

When I told Kylie that we’ve been here 3 months, she said, “Holy cow! That’s crazy!” For her, the best part of being here has been all of the friends she’s made and “how it’s kind of like we have 1 big backyard that we share with all of our friends.” The worst/hardest part for her is trying to talk to people in the U.S. because you can’t have a real conversation unless you’re up really early or really late. (She has been enjoying FaceTime, texting, and emailing her friends at home. I’m pretty lenient with when she can do it because she is very right- it is so difficult to communicate regularly, and I love that she still feels like part of the group.) Ky misses how small her school at home was, and she misses eating good burgers, pizza, and Mexican food.

I’m not sure one paragraph will be enough for me to answer my own questions. There’s so much more that I need to write about, and I know it’s been almost a month since I last posted, so I have high hopes for getting back to posting regularly and sharing more of what life here is looking like right now. Briefly, I would say that the best part of this experience so far for me has been the friends we’ve made and watching as all 5 of us work to figure out our new life. I know that we picked the right condo for us; the families that we’ve met here have been really great, we all have friends, and I could not be happier with how it has all turned out. My kids are so much savvier now than they were 3 months ago, and there’s nothing I love more than witnessing their excitement and awe as they learn about the rest of the world. The fact that Logan came home a few weeks into the school year and told me that it was someone’s birthday and that the class sang to her in 6 different languages illustrates exactly why we were willing to make this move. I could never have taught them this global awareness at home. As for the worst/hardest part for me, I have to agree with Kylie- not being able to just pick up the phone and call people when I want to is super-frustrating. Now that Chicago has “fallen back,” we are 14 hours ahead in Singapore. Trying to call at a time when our kids will be up, especially to talk to my grandmas or FaceTime with my baby nephews when they will also be up, is so hard. Also difficult is having to work so hard to find food here that I want my family to eat; more on that soon, but just feeding this group consumes a huge amount of my time. Our lack of family time since our move has also been extremely difficult; again, this will be a post unto itself, but the hope we had going into this that we’d have so much more quality time as a family is not currently the case. Now, for some of the things I miss: fresh air (as in, air that’s not so polluted that I regularly have to sweep up piles of soot from my balcony), blue skies, changing seasons (as it’s perpetual August here, and I’m a fall-weather-kind-of-girl), Independence Grove, Chicago-style pizza, Five Guys burgers, Sunset Foods, my car, the occasional OK-hair-day (and Lindsay, who has cut my hair for years), wearing jeans, Cook Library, Comcast (and let me be the first to say that I never would have anticipated that one), The Chicago Tribune… the list goes on.

I’d say that all in all, the Skibitzki family is doing fine. We are now entering a season of holidays and birthdays that will be tricky to navigate. On the plus side, we have the first of our trips coming up, so we are anxious to really begin exploring the Asia-Pacific region. Also, we’re now coming to the time of year when the weather is not so pleasant back home, which helps a little bit; we are looking forward to a winter with no shoveling required!

 

 

 

 

A Tale of Two Kitchens

Real estate in Singapore has some standard quirks. When we began our house-hunt here, we quickly learned the difference between the “wet” kitchen and the “dry” kitchen and that we should expect to see this strange, divided set-up in each condo that we viewed. How does this work? Well, the wet kitchen is not air-conditioned, and in theory, it can be hosed down after use. (In practice, I can’t imagine actually doing this.) The stovetop is located in the wet kitchen, as is the sink. (We are fortunate enough to have a prep sink in our dry kitchen, though this isn’t always the case.) The washer and dryer are also typically housed in the wet kitchen area. The location of the refrigerator and oven seemed to vary by property. There are cabinets in both kitchens. Some properties we saw had dishwashers, while others did not. (This was a deal-breaker for me; ours has a dishwasher in the wet kitchen.) Some places had microwaves, while others had steam ovens, which seem to be a popular trend over here. We have a microwave that sits on the counter in our wet kitchen, and we do not have a dedicated steam oven (though it’s possible that 1 of the many settings on our oven actually enables it to perform this function).

Dry kitchen

Cooktop, dishwasher, and microwave in wet kitchen

Primary sink in wet kitchen

Post-9/11, the Singapore government mandated that all properties have bomb shelters. More often than not, we found that these were located off the wet kitchen. Additionally, it is extremely common in Singapore for families to have “helpers.” More on this in a future post, but in many instances, the bomb shelter doubles as the helper’s bedroom, and the helper’s bathroom is located in the same vicinity.

Entrance to bomb shelter off of wet kitchen

Using the bomb shelter to store sports equipment

Using the bomb shelter to store cleaning supplies, folding table and chairs, and pool toys

Helper’s bathroom off the wet kitchen (only used by me for the sink, my “utility tub” here)

How am I liking the wet and dry combo? Not very well, really. I used to get irritated at home because it seemed that every time I turned the water on in the kitchen, someone would start talking to me from another room and expect me to be able to hear them. “I can’t hear you when the water is running,” was a common refrain of mine. Now that we have this divided kitchen set-up, the kids (and occasionally Brad) like to wait until I have headed into the wet kitchen to start a conversation with me, and I absolutely can’t make out a single thing they’re saying. I also feel like the helper when I have to go out to the hot, humid wet kitchen to cook, do dishes, or change laundry loads. There is a window (not with glass, mind you- open-air), and just outside of it is the balcony that houses our air conditioners. Above the hum of the A/C from all the condos in our tower and the sound of traffic and fountains outside, it is quite noisy out there. If the washer or dryer is going, forget about it.

Glass-less window in wet kitchen, the source of lots of dust and dirt

An interesting phenomenon is that at meal times, you can smell everyone else’s food when you enter the wet kitchen. I also worry about making too much noise out there late in the evening, when presumably, the helpers in other condos are trying to sleep. This is tough because I get some of my best work done late at night, and doing the dishes always seems to be one of those late-night tasks. We have a trash chute in the wet kitchen that is somewhat noisy to use, so I try to empty my cans earlier in the evening. I really dislike having a sliding glass door that divides the dirty dishes that end up on the counter in the dry kitchen and the dishwasher that they need to be loaded into in the wet. I can’t store any food in the wet kitchen because of the humidity. When I am using the stove, it is so hot out there; I emerge a sweaty mess. Additionally, because it is open-air, the counters constantly need to be wiped down. On Fridays when the fogging occurs to rid the premises of mosquitoes, there is no way to close off the wet kitchen as the chemical cloud wafts upward. I bring my crock of cooking utensils into the dry kitchen every Friday morning to keep them pesticide-free; I really don’t like having them sitting out in the wet kitchen at all because of the dust/soot that collects out there, but there’s not really another convenient spot for them. I find myself back and forth, sliding the door open and closed, constantly. Given what we pay to air-condition our home, I don’t want to leave that door open for long and let cool air escape!

Washer, dryer, and trash chute in wet kitchen

In general, I find the kitchen combo to be adequate and modern. However, it can’t compare to the kitchen I left behind. At home, I had a 5-burner stove; here, I have 3 burners, and they are small and temperamental (and the largest one is designed to hold a wok; regular pots and pans do not work very well on it). The ovens here are ridiculously tiny; a quarter-sheet-sized baking sheet is the largest that fits on the rack. All of my baking sheets that are just slightly larger actually slide into the grooves that are meant to hold the rack. There is also a tray that comes with the oven that provides my largest baking surface. It is very hard to generate enough food for 5 people in this oven, and seldom are there leftovers. When using the oven, I spend most of my time rotating baking sheets. Also of note is the fact that the oven temp is measured in Celsius, so I have a foolproof conversion method: everything goes in at 180-200 degrees, and I know that it’s going to cook quicker than I expect because everything runs hotter here- oven, micro, dryer…

Tiny oven in dry kitchen

Our refrigerator, hidden behind cabinet panels, is actually 2 refrigerators, side by side, that appear to be a good size. However, upon closer inspection, they are actually very shallow, despite their decent width. There is no icemaker, and the ice cube trays are a joke- they are tiny and make cubes the size of hail that melt immediately upon being put in a beverage. Room-temperature is the coolest water our faucets provide. Poor Brad was muttering about the water and ice situation for days after we moved in. I now keep a pitcher of water in the fridge, but I’ve stopped bothering with the ice.

Shallow fridges in dry kitchen

At home, I had 2 floor-to-ceiling pantries; here, I have parts of 2 cabinets and a drawer that I’m able to allocate to food items. At home, I had a standard-sized kitchen garbage can that pulled out of my island; here, I have a small garbage can in each kitchen; larger ones wouldn’t work because the bags wouldn’t fit down the trash chute. There is no garbage disposal (while at home, I had 1 in each sink), so scraping plates into the tiny garbage can is getting old very quickly.

Is there anything in my kitchen(s) here that I like better than my kitchen at home? Nope! Actually, there is 1 item that we have here that we did not have at home: a wine fridge. Don’t get me started, however, on the price of wine in Singapore; this wine cooler at first seemed to be mocking us as it stood empty. Now, we’ve given in and anted up; our cooler typically houses a handful of wine bottles. I’ve also found this fridge useful to store extra bottles of plain sparkling water, my new beverage of choice (after adding a twist of lemon), given that my go-to, orange LaCroix, is not available here.

Wine fridge, heavy on the water, light on the wine

So, there you have it- a kitchen divided. I feel fortunate to have what I do, but I’m fairly certain that I’ll never really get used to it, and I will definitely not be employing this model when designing my next kitchen at home!